Full of Hormones

My mom once told me that she knew the day that she conceived that she was pregnant. Last night, chatting with my husband in bed, I told him I have absolutely no idea if I’m pregnant right now. Even if I suspected I was, I wouldn’t believe it because of all the hormones in my system!

I imagine I still have some of the HCG from my trigger shot in my bloodstream, and on top of that I’m supplementing with progesterone suppositories to support the possible pregnancy that may have resulted from the IUI. The vaginal suppositories are nasty – I insert them twice a day and wear a pad the rest of the time because they leak like crazy. I constantly feel like I’ve wet my pants. But the worst part is the mood swings – I’ll watch a sentimental TV ad and be fighting back tears, then the next minute I’ll be angry at my husband over some small thing, then the next minute I’ll be feeling totally giddy. Most of the time, though, I’m just feeling kind of sad and mopey (and very clingy with my husband!), and I’m sure it’s the hormones. It’s not like me.

My breasts also feel huge and super sore. I know that’s an early symptom of pregnancy, but it’s also a known side effect of the hormones. I’ve also had some cramping that feels like period cramps – enough that I called the doctor’s office, where the nurse told me it’s normal after an IUI. It’s too early to be implantation cramping so it’s probably just related to the procedure. My doctor also warned me to expect some spotting after the IUI but I never had any.

So, all in all, I’m just feeling pretty weird. I’ve been keeping up with my meds and treatments just fine but between the suppositories, the thrice-daily cocktail of prenatal vitamins, and generally feeling like a bloated hormonal mess, it’s hard not to feel like this fertility stuff is taking over my life. And I’m not even doing IVF! God help me if I have to start doing daily injections at some point.

It’s a little over a week until my blood test to determine whether I’m pregnant or not. Hopefully all of this won’t be for nothing.


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